


Alien Holiday Traditions and Customs?

by MorganWolf



Category: Jupiter Ascending (2015)
Genre: Costumes, JA Secret Santa, New Holiday Tradition, jupiter ascending secret santa 2019
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-23
Updated: 2019-12-23
Packaged: 2021-02-25 06:27:33
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,052
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21911464
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MorganWolf/pseuds/MorganWolf
Summary: JA Secret Santa present for avengersincamphalfbloodstardis 2019 :)Merry Christmas and I hope you enjoy reading it!
Comments: 5
Kudos: 4





	Alien Holiday Traditions and Customs?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [avengersincamphalfbloodstardis](https://archiveofourown.org/users/avengersincamphalfbloodstardis/gifts).



Alien Holiday Traditions and Customs

Jupiter was scrolling through one of her sheaves, looking for something but getting more and more frustrated that she couldn’t find it. Throwing it onto an ever-expanding pile of the “alien” technology information devices (called sheaves, obviously), she randomly grabbed another one from an ever-decreasing pile of more of said “alien” devices. “Oi!!! Jupe!” shouted Kiza, almost in Jupiters’ ear. “Yaargh!!! Kiza! What the stars?!!!!” she yelped in fright. “Ba ha ha hah haa hhaaa!!!!!” Kiza laughed happily!!! “Wow, where were you? Zabbosie???!!!!!” Jupiter poked her tongue at the young woman and threw a cushion at her. Kiza neatly caught it, pirouetted, and threw it back at the reincarnation of a rich and powerful space-queen.

Jupiter ducked, and the pink, fuzzy, airborne cushion sailed past her face, and straight into the large pile of sheaves on her left. The momentum of the squishy missile was enough to send the black pile of glass-like rectangles of misery, scattering across Stingers’ lounge room floor with a cacophony of tinkling and glass-breaking-on-tiled-floor-like sounds. “KIZA!!!!!” yelled Stinger from the back office. “Wasn’t me Da! It was Jupe!!!!” Kiza yelled back to him. “Was not!” Yelled Jupiter. “She started it!!!” Both of them looked at each other, then burst out laughing. “Quick, better clean this up before he comes out of there!” whispered Jupiter quickly, glancing towards the back rooms of the house. “Clean what up?” Caine asked, peering over Kiza’s shoulder.

“Caine!! Oh honeypots!!!!! You scared the crap out of me!!!” Kiza shrieked, jumping away from the smirking Lycantant ex-Legionnaire. “Wow, that’s a mess.” he added, as he skirted the faded, cream-coloured armchair. Studying the pile, he absent-mindedly adjusted the handmade throw on the top of the armchair, Jupiter having pulled it skewwhiff when she ducked fuzzy cushion. Jupiter tilted her head, dog-like, at his action, and Kiza just snorted. “What?” asked Caine, before he noticed what he was doing. “Nothing,” Kiza grinned. “Just reminded me of old times, is all.” Caine rolled his eyes. “C’mon you two, help me clean this up already!” cajoled Jupiter. “Yeah, yeah Princess.” Replied Kiza dramatically. “Kiza!” snapped Caine. “Queen!!!!! Not Princess!!” Caine reprimanded her, mock-shocked that she would say such a thing. “Beeswax Caine! Lighten up already. Jupe knows I was joking!” Kiza moaned, rolling her eyes at him. Jupiter snorted, and Kiza, seeing the look on Caines’ face, poked her tongue at him and grinned wickedly.

“There must be a hundred sheaves here. What are you looking for?” asked Kiza, rounding the armchair and plunking herself down next to the mess of sheaves. Jupiter turned slightly red and Caine tilted his head, dog-like, at her embarrassment. “Um, so you know how there are heaps of different culture and family traditions and stuff on Earth? Well, I was kinda wondering about the traditions and customs you guys have. You know, from out there.” She gestured skywards. Caine and Kiza looked at each other with surprised expressions, and Caine turned back to the pile of technology he was trying to help clean up. Kiza giggled at the colour change of his ears. Being an albino runt meant any embarrassment he felt, showed, and very clearly. Jupiter caught the direction of Kizas laugh and looked to Caine too. She knew that he knew that she was looking at him, and his ears turned a brighter shade of red. “Ok,” Jupiter questioned. “What gives?”

Stinger coughed quietly from the doorway behind her, and Caine almost charged out the front door, without looking at the young women on his way out. Jupe saw his wings unfurl as he launched himself from the top step of the porch, and hurtled up into the sky within a heartbeat. “Um??” Jupe asked Stinger, thumbing her hand towards the front door. “Yeah, I’m gonna go check on the hives. Catch you later, Your Majesty.” Kiza added, and left out the back door. “Ok, that was weird.” Jupe stated. Stinger just sighed and came and sat down carefully on the floor where Kiza had just been. The carpet was getting old and worn, but he adamantly refused to let Jupiter assign Keepers to install new carpet. Or kitchen lino, or new cupboards, or walls and paint. He liked his honeycomb-laden old homestead just the way it was, thank you very much. Jupiter felt as though she was about to get a lesson in history, and not a very interesting one from the way Kiza and Caine hightailed it outside.

“So, Your Majesty,” Stinger coughed, clearing his throat. “What is it that you want to know?” “Well, um. Like I said, I was kinda wondering about the traditions and customs you guys have.” Jupe asked hopefully. Stinger sighed as he rubbed the back of his neck. “Am I not supposed to ask you this stuff?” Jupiter hesitated. Stinger buzzed gently as he chuckled. “I’m not sure there is anything that you wouldn’t ask, Majesty.” he grinned. “Unfortunately, though, there’s not much I can tell you. We’re not allowed to have any customs or traditions.” “Wait, what?” asked Jupiter stunned. “What do you mean you’re not allowed to have any? Who makes up dumb shit like that?” “Entitleds, Your Majesty.” sighed Stinger, wondering where this was going to lead to. “Basically, the do whatever they want and make their own laws, within the confines of their own systems, of course. Entitleds have laws that regulate the whole universe. It keeps life under control and supposedly chaos free. Of course, we still have wars and criminals and such, and Entitleds trying to take what other Entitleds have, hence the Aegis. But no way of life is perfect.”

“Well, that sux!” stated Jupiter firmly. Stinger chuckled and leant back into his chair. “We’re splices, so we don’t get any choice. We have to do what we’re told.” Jupiter studied him for a few moments, thinking. “What was that about ‘male mating rituals’ then. You know, when I first came here?” she inquired. Both Stinger and Jupiter jumped as there was a loud scraping of tiles on the roof, followed by the sound of them crashing onto the ground outside. “What the …?” started Jupiter, racing to the window. “Beeswax Caine. You’d better be fixing that!” grumbled Stinger at the roof.” “Wait, that was Caine? What was he doing on the roof?” Jupiter asked, turning back to Stinger. “Probably listening, and hiding. He used to like to perch up there sometimes. There’s a small area right on the top that’s flat and just wide enough to lay on. He’d better not have broken the antennas again. Damn Pup.” Jupe snorted, making Stinger grin. “You said Entitleds make their own laws? Is that like for just on the planets they seed?” she queried. “Yes, Majesty.” Stinger replied, studying the young woman when she sat back down in the armchair. “What do you have in mind?” “Soo, if I made a law that said you had to dress up like a movie character or something scary for a day or two, you’d all have to do it?” “Stars, Majesty! Really?” Stinger asked, sounding a little worried. “But yes, if you did that, then every splice you own, I mean employ, or that lived on any of the planets you own, would have to do that.”

“Oooh, I have an idea!!” Kiza called out, coming up the hallway from the back of the house. A swarm of the bees that were following her inside realised that Jupiter was there, and noisily made a bee-line for her. She laughed and held up her arms for them to circle around. They all took turns gently landing on her hands in greeting before buzzing happily out the window, back to their hives. “Wow, you made their day!” grinned Kiza happily. “Now, costume ideas. We could do like your Halloween ones, or movie characters like Pennywise or Doctor Who, or that goat guy from Percy Jackson, yeah, Grover Underwood, soo hot!!” “Ok, that’s enough Kiza!” grumbled Stinger, shaking his head. Jupe just laughed at them both. “But, that’s not a bad idea though, Kiza. We could make it in the slowest time of year. When there aren’t many other holiday or traditional stuff going on?” mused Jupiter. “But when’s that?” asked Kiza. “Start Googling, Minion!” mock-commanded Jupiter. “Ma’am! Yes, Ma’am!” saluted Kiza, who promptly plonked herself on the carpet next to the pile of sheaves. After a few minutes of tapping and swearing, Kiza finally found a date.

“So, how about the last weekend in June? I know it’s cold as f..” “KIZA!!” interrupted Stinger! “Da?! What????” asked Kiza innocently! “Watch your language!” “Beeswax! You watch yours, Old Man! I _Was_ going to say, before you _so Rudely_ interrupted. It’s cold as frozen snot on a Yeti’s nose, buuuut, if the celebration is held indoors, it might be a way to cheer people up?” Kiza suggested. “And, it could be _Only_ if people want to. It won’t be a _Law_ law type of thing. Just to break up the frostiness of winter.” added Jupiter. “Everyone can join in, or not. Splices, Entitleds, Everyone. I won’t chop off anyone’s heads if they don’t want to do it.” “Well, that’s good to hear, Your Majesty.” sighed Stinger, relieved. “But that doesn’t include you, Da!!! You’re definitely dressing up! Caine too!! Right, Majesty?” “Oh yeah! I defiantly do not want you two to feel like you’ve been left out, or anything!!!” grinned Jupiter wickedly. “You know, I reckon you’d look good in an Iron Man costume.” “Oh, Stars no, Majesty!” groaned Stinger, rubbing his face with his hand in dismay. “Oh come on, Da!! It will be fun!!!” “I’d rather go naked.” he replied, sourly. “Eww, no!!! Iron Man costume it is!” shuddered Kiza. “Here, write a list Kiza.” said Jupiter as she tossed a blank sheave into Kizas’ lap. “This is gonna be good!” “So, Da as Iron Man, Caine as …?

“Well, I might have to think about that one. What about you? What would you pick?” asked Jupiter. “Oh, that’s easy!! I’m going as a dalek!” laughed Kiza. “What’s a Dalek?” asked Caine, sneaking up the back hallway. Both Kiza and Jupiters jaws dropped at the same time. “What’s? What’s a…? Oooh, you’re in for an education now!!!!!” spluttered Jupiter to a bewildered Lycantant. “Doctor Who marathon, coming right up!” yipped Kiza as she scooted over to the tv.

_Three weeks (and a truck load of hot buttered popcorn) later_

“Finally! The new holiday celebration is all official! That took long enough!” Kiza tromped in the front door waving a newly delivered sheath from one of Jupes local Keepers. “Woohoo!” replied Jupe enthusiastically. “So that means we can start the new tradition, finally! Do you think anyone will actually participate in it?” “Well. You made it law, even though it’s not a _Law_ law, so they will. Probably be a bit confusing for most splices at first, but if you put out a Vid of it, I’m sure they will get the idea, eventually.” Caine replied. “It will take a while, Majesty, for everyone to feel secure about it. We’ve never actually been allowed to do anything like this. You certainly are one for a lot of firsts for us all.” “The whole idea that splices are less than human just infuriates me!!! To me, you aren’t _more_ animal than human, you’re better than human. You are all people, and deserve to be treated as such.” declared Jupiter firmly.

“Oh wow! I just thought of a brilliant costume for you for next month!” piped up Kiza happily. “I can hardly wait.” replied Caine dryly. “Be right back, gotta order it!” Jupiter all but fell out of Caines arms chasing after Kiza to see what the young bee-splice had thought of. A few minutes of Kiza muttering under her breath, then “Ta-da! All done and done! Oh, you’re so gonna love this!!” she laughed. “Yeah, right.” Caine replied. “Oh, this is gonna be good!” giggled Jupiter, next to Kiza. “Yeah, um. Majesty? What in the stars is an LGM Pizza Planet Alien?” Caine whispered into Jupiters ear, his arms sliding around her waist from behind. “Oh, just you wait and see, My Love.” she replied, and kissed him on the cheek. “Just you wait and see!!”

The End


End file.
